How Do I Tell My Parents that I Want to Go to Therapy?
At any point in your life, deciding that you would like to seek the help of a mental health professional is a big decision. When you’re in your mid-late teens, even though you’re technically an adult after 18, it can be daunting either making your own decisions for the first time or telling your loved ones that you want to pursue counseling services. For many teens who cannot afford their own healthcare, this decision must be discussed, and for those under 18, teens may even need a parent or guardian’s signature.
In some family situations, if you believe that your parents or guardians won’t support your decision, you may experience anxiety and fear, which are roadblocks to a healthier life. Whether this be because of previous experience discussing counseling or a fear that they’ll misunderstand, bringing the topic up can be very difficult.
Here are 5 tips on how to tell your parents that you want to go to therapy!
1. Compile Your Information
By going into the conversation prepared, you’ll have reason, logic, and supporting information to back you up when you ask about going to therapy. Having resources ready can also show your parents that you have an investment in and an understanding of what it means to go to therapy. This commitment could include doing research and contacting the providers at different counseling centers for pricing per appointment, whether or not they accept insurance, and whether or not they specialize in the service you’re looking for.
2. Think About Potential Questions They Might Have
If you think that your parents will be against the idea of you going to therapy, or hesitant because they don’t understand why, put yourself into their shoes and use that perspective to come up with information specific to what they might be opposed to. Anticipate questions that they might have, especially if this is the first time you’ve spoken to them about therapy, as they might have the potential to feel blindsided, such as:
How long have you been feeling this way?
Has something happened that has contributed to how you’re feeling?
Did we do or fail to do something that has led to where you are and how you’re feeling now?
Why didn’t you talk to us about this first?
3. Pick a Time that Works for Everyone
Be strategic in deciding when to bring the subject up. If your parents are busy, distracted, frustrated about something unrelated, or on a schedule themselves, they might not be able to give you their full attention or think as clearly and rationally as they could if you brought the topic up at another time. If your parent(s) or guardian(s) never seems to be able to speak with you free of distractions, ask if you could meet with them privately or invite them somewhere where you could talk, such as on a walk, on a drive, or doing something you can enjoy together and have the conversation then. You can also utilize the next tip and arrange a phone call, video chat, or other means of communication rather than trying to force a face-to-face discussion.
4. Consider Other Methods of Communication
If you panic while thinking about discussing counseling with your parents face to face, can’t find a good time to bring it up, or just don’t know how to tell them, consider other manners of communication. It’s actually recommended to write out what you want to tell your parents to organize your thoughts even if you end up speaking with them in person, so don’t be afraid to explore other options!
You can always outline your desires, reasons, and supporting information in:
An email
A written letter
A voice message
A thorough text message
For each method, however, you should have the same information included and try to follow up with your parents in-person if possible so that your request isn’t put to the side.
5. Involve Another Adult
All of this might sound overwhelming and like too much pressure, especially if you’re juggling it on top of schoolwork, a job, sports, or other extracurricular activities. It’s always a good idea to have another trusted adult in your corner to offer advice and support, even if they don’t have the power to put you into therapy themselves. This could be a teacher, coach, school counselor, family friend, or other relative that can help you do your research, put your thoughts together, and find a good way to approach the conversation with your parents or guardians.
Looking for a Therapist for Teens 16 Years and Older? Dawn Pendleton Can Help!
Dawn Pendleton is a therapist based in Louisville, KY and caters quality counseling services to individuals 16 years of age and older as well as families via in-person and telehealth appointments. With specialties in EMDR and trauma therapy, LGBTQIA+ issues, and sports and performance enhancement, Dawn has a service for everyone of age and is currently accepting new clients in the Kentucky and Southern Indiana areas.
If you or someone you love is looking for a reliable, trustworthy counselor with specialties in the LGBTQIA+ community, sports and performance enhancement, and those affected by trauma, Dawn Pendleton of Pendleton Counseling Collaborative, EMDR-certified and Licensed Marriage and Family therapist, is currently accepting new clients. With over 20 years of experience working in both the public and private sectors of the mental health field, Dawn is licensed to provide in-person and telehealth services in both Kentucky and Indiana. Feel free to fill out an inquiry form with any additional questions, call (502) 377-1690, or visit her website to book an appointment.